L for Lying
Pretending you have a good sense of humour is one thing. Pretending to be someone you’re not to trick someone into sex is another.
We all know that people are likely to bend the truth on dating apps. And while you don’t have to tell someone everything on the first date respect matters from the start.
Catfishing is when someone creates a fake profile online and pretends to be someone or something else. They might change their name, lie about their age or pretend to have qualifications, work, family or experiences they don’t have. They might seem really nice and charming online, while in real life the truth is something else.
Spotting someone who is catfishing can be really hard. Sometimes people use a fake profile picture. Doing a Reverse Image Search might help with this, but it is not a 100% guarantee that the photo is of them or that the person is safe. Using a fake image is only one way a person might be lying. It is important to remember that people who catfish have spent a lot of time working out what they need to say to get what they want. It is never your fault if someone tricks you.
A person who catfishes might:
- Seem too good to be true
- Never want to video chat or speak over the phone
- Move quickly, telling you that they love you soon after meeting online
- Not have many other friends or contacts or very little on their social media profile
- Might not give you much information about themselves while they want to know a lot about you.
Some people who catfish might pressure you into sharing nude or semi-nude images or they might tell you that they have hacked into your webcam. Others might ask you for money or try to use details to commit fraud. You might arrange to meet in person to find out they are not who they said they are.
If you do ever choose to meet someone from the internet, it is always best to do this in a public place, maybe with a friend watching. Arrange to have someone call you part way through the date and if things don’t feel right, leave. Whether they’ve bought you flowers, a drink or a meal, you don’t owe them anything.
If you are worried that you have been catfished, tricked into sending nudes or anything else you might feel scared, embarrassed or ashamed. It is important to know that support is available. Notts SVSS helpline can help with incidents of sexual violence or assault, while the Revenge Porn helpline can help if you are worried about nudes. You can also call Action Fraud if money has been involved or the police.
If you are in any danger call the police on 999.
